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Waiting for the Master

by Richard Haxton

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1.
Waiting for the Master 01:29
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We’re waiting for the master. We hope he comes along We have to tell him something. He can make right from wrong We will speak our warning words until he’s understood But he hasn’t been this way in years so our chances are not good Still we wait and still we hope, what else can we do Something’s happened in the castle, so bad we can’t tell you Only the master has control, and as soon as he decides We can leave our vigil and go back to our lives We try to spell each other, but our greatest fear Is that the master passed this way when nobody was here So if you can put down your load and stand with us a while And if you gain our trust, you can share our trial We’re waiting, we’re waiting, we’re waiting for the master
2.
Piece of the Night 01:27
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In a dusty trailer village just outside a bayou town I’m born in a lightning storm, the rain is coming down Mama dies when I am three. The neighbor takes me in He mixes the redemption and the sin He throws me out when I am twelve. ‘You’re evil don’t come back’ I’m living on my knees. The sky is going black But the light of Polaris always pulls me through When you’re lost you do what you have to do One night I have a vision that points me to the way Its says I’ll light all my tomorrows from the fire of yesterday So to the proper parties I want to give some thanks If you don’t hear your name, you fill in the blanks Thanks for all you did for me For everything you let me see If I should die before the light Thank you for this piece of the night
3.
Order 00:30
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This morning I woke up Took my shower Drank my coffee Read my paper Kissed my wife goodbye Caught the 7:13 into the city Sat where I usually sit Reached the office at the usual time Worked until my 10:30 break I was standing at the water cooler talking When they came in from next door and told us about the bomb I walked back into my office Turned on my Dictaphone Knowing that I only have enough time for a quick message And that the chances of anybody ever hearing it are remote I know I have to get my priorities in or….
4.
Me and the Devil 01:25
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I sat down with the devil He said take a look at me Do I look like a threat? With me you can be what you wanna be You choose the channel Whatever floats your boat It’s all up to you, baby You hold the remote He’s got one big eye With a cold mechanical stare And he talks to me Like it don’t matter who is there But he gives me access to almost everywhere So it’s just me and the devil And though he can’t walk I love to listen to him talk So it’s me and the devil
5.
Basic Cable 01:37
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I didn’t know I had a life or what it was all about Until that dark and fateful night my power went out I sat there in my living room and though I could not see I’d stared at the big black hole where my TV used to be I missed all the comforting terrifying things it said And then something even worse – a thought entered my head It was just a tiny thought about the way I used to be But it bounced around those empty walls until it was filling me So I got up from my easy chair and I walked outside My neighbors all were in their yards. There was no place to hide I heard some call to me — Hey are you OK And I heard myself answer — Maybe it’s better this way Then someone said – Come over. We’re gonna build a fire Then I was in their circle. I began to feel inspired We talked of many things, though we hardly knew each other About a world that lived in peace, like sisters and brothers The lights went on from the power grid like the coming of the dawn They said - We’d love to stay and chat, but our favorite program’s on And I saw my life through different eyes – what it could have been If only I were a stronger, if I did not give in And sometimes when the show is done and the pitch is being made I say I won’t live this way another day. I’m gonna upgrade Basic cable basic cable basic cable is killing me
6.
The World Is Filled with Love 1 00:58
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The world is filled with love Beautiful people doing beautiful things Like they was sent from up above Life is a beautiful song for the one who sings I have to admit I have thought He got killed cuz he was stupid But lately I have come to believe They killed him because They were temporarily crazy
7.
This One's Graffiti Is the Other One's Home 01:26
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This one’s graffiti is the other one’s home Like Caesar and Brutus in the Senate in Rome Like homeless children in the Superdome This one’s graffiti is the other one’s home Steel balls rattle in a spray paint can While global corporations furnish their plan To one hundred pundits paid to slay Whatever fool gets in their way Cover the people with a blanket of lies While the children are covered with a blanket of flies With the sound of commercials in their eyes and their ears The children spray paint the walls with their tears
8.
Flat 01:46
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Some say the human heart is dark and it was born to bleed I say that heart has just one more dimension than it needs The tough guys all say –Suck it up. The sissies sit and cry I say don’t do either one. I say simplify I can’t believe how good I feel since there is no more tension Since I started living life in only two dimensions Now I see my problems and I face them all head on Cuz when I try to turn sideways — I disappear. I’m gone I’ve lived and I’ve loved and I’ve laughed and I’ve cried I may not be too deep but I’ve looked far and wide To find the perfect soul mate who knows just where I’m at Now I’ve finally found her and she’s just like me. She’s flat Some say the world is made of clay and it’s your job to shape her But you’d be amazed how good she looks when she’s only on paper
9.
Small Rut 00:31
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Yes, you’re in a small rut now But if you can just hold on Have faith and let the world do its work Soon you’ll be in the Grand Canyon
10.
Do It Fast 01:25
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I speed read the fools and the greats Cruised the Louvre at eighty mph A thousand nights were like a minute to me I laughed in the face of eternity Had a hundred women in one night I was fast as your average satellite That’s ten women in less than an hour Don Juan would envy my power If you’re gonna do it do it do it If you’re gonna do it do it fast If you’re gonna do it do it do it Do it fast cuz nothing lasts I listened to music at triple speed Melody and harmony I don’t need I saw everything. I was fierce and bold And only lived to be six months old That was all I needed to become a sage Cuz life is a level, just a stage And life was always boring to me Now I’m roaring through hell in my SUV Chorus Fuck the fine points and subtleties Don’t cross your “I”s don’t dot your “T”s You gotta jam you gonna do it all Spin the moon like a tether ball Chorus
11.
Married to the Mine 01:20
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All day I earn my pay way down deep in the mine While a rich man way across town drinks thousand dollar wine Like to take me a long vacation, but I can’t find the time My wife is just a mistress, cuz I’m married to the mine I believe in this nation Built on a strong foundation Gonna get me an education And then I’ll be ridin’ high All day deep in the earth paying layaway on the sun One day it’s all gonna change. I’m gonna be someone Til that day all I can say – It’s just me and the grind You don’t get no honeymoon when you’re married to the mine I’ll just have to be patient Lower my expectations Til my train hits the station Til my life is mine
12.
Sixteen Hour Day 01:37
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13.
In Our Hometown 00:49
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In our hometown you can use a gun but you cannot use no dildo They passed a law when a woman got caught and they throwed her in the joint She robbed a seven-eleven store and held the clerk at dildo point She said – gimme all your money. Honey, stop, or I’ll vibrate you til you drop And we can breathe easier, hon Cuz if somebody wants our dough They’re gonna have to use a gun Cuz in our hometown you cannot use no dildo
14.
Life's Bowl of Nasty Words 01:11
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Mama told me don’t use nasty words They will spin you life out of control And I tried to do what mama said But all my nasty words have took their toll First there was that tiny little shucks Then there was that darn it and that heck I did not observe no lighting bolts Did not feel no rope around my neck How could one poor boy know That an innocent little heck or shucks Would lead directly to the hard stuff I woke up in a world of shits and fucks Now I’m on the street Nobody is my friend That’s me on the corner The world’s gonna end And if you come up to me with a kind word or good luck You will receive in return A shit on you and fuck you Mama told me right and I should have heard I ate all my dreams and turned them into turds Now I’m swirling down life's bowl of nasty words
15.
The Totality Makeover Body Wash 01:29
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The Totality Makeover Body Wash I used to be a loser. My life was just a chain of train wrecks Before I tried the body wash, I never had a chance for love or sex The first time that I used it was a once in a lifetime occasion I found myself captivated Einstein’s thought equations And before you could blink I'd proved the link between the strong force and gravity And before you protest, yes, I did this, like, totally mathematically And double blind, and I built a time machine that lets you visit eternity Then I pinpointed the big bang, it was 1936, November 23 But the main thing is now all these scientific chicks can’t get enough of me So if you have insecurities of any kind that you need to quash I totally recommend the totality makeover body wash Hey, don’t you let the good life pass you by You need to give this body wash a try Don’t matter if you’re ugly or you’re stupid or you’re mean The body was can give your life that very special sheen
16.
The Center of Attention 00:55
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I am the center of attention Everybody’s looking at me Everything else is just a distraction. Just waves in a waving arm sea So bring your eyes back, stay on the track, concentrate You don’t have to think anything deep, you’ll lose your sleep You don’t have to doubt, check me out, I’ll set you free You don’t need a goat. I’m the antidote to you I am the center of attention Everybody’s looking at me
17.
Captain Whatever 01:31
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She says I won’t be taking up any more of your valuable time But more to the point, you won’t be taking up any more of mine He said she was his best friend and then he let her go He said he really loved her but forgot to let you know She says wasted we much time together All for worse, never better You knew we’d never find forever Now you’re my super hero — I’ll call you Captain Whatever
18.
The World Is Filled with Love 2 00:58
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The World is Filled with Love The world is filled with love Beautiful people doing beautiful things Like they was send from up above Life is a beautiful song for the one who sings So I jewed him down but he welched on a bet So I nigger-rigged his car He hollered like a towel head. I drove like a chink Just to show him who the hell I are I’m a redneck fool full of sieg heil cool Drinking shine from an old fruit jar Til that beaner cop pulled me over and throwed me behind these bars I ain’t no fag and I ain’t no geek or limp wrested gook from Hong Kong But I let a little Greek pinch me on the cheek And he showed me I was wrong I stole a pencil from a drunk dago and some paper from a Polak prong And I put everything down in the words of this little song The world has got its ins and outs, got its ups and downs, but you got to let ‘em pass And if some low life mutha fucka plays with you Just bitch slap their sorry ass
19.
I'm Starting To Repeat Myself 01:03
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I’m starting to repeat myself Say things I said before Mention items already mentioned Identical words as days of yore Track the same verbal territory Walk the same semantic ground Trot out the same tired adages Find the same words that I found Reiterate reiterations Use phrases already used Then I’ll use recurring phrases To echo what I’ve reproduced I rehash it over and over Reach conclusions I’ve already reached Ditto the last phraseology Repetitive in my speech But when I quote my own quotations I don’t worry that I’ve slipped It leads back to the beginning Like a verbal Möbius strip I’m Starting to Repeat Myself Yeah, yeah
20.
The Cartoon Life 01:15
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Good guys and the bad guys locked in a fight Only got a few more pages make it all turn out right Neighbor’s always complaining. Will not shut his trap Don’t need negotiation. Nuke his ass off the map Thought bubble big trouble It’s the cartoon life Indecision is weakness. We’ve known that all along Make up your mind. Put down your foot. Even if you’re wrong you’re strong If you don’t like the scenery at the bottom of your hole Time for you to start digging, exercise control
21.
Aria for the Elevation of Man 01:42
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I am a big manly man And I am a small girly girlamente I have voted since the country began I got the right to vote in 1920 I am quite strong and can cause great physical harm I am very weak and can barely lift my arm I have many large hairs covering my face and body The hairs covering my face are very small and the ones covering my body are … well…some of them are….never mind I have this penis and two potent testicles All I have is this vagina and some ovaries I can run very fast and jump very high I run slower and jump lower I am very brave and never cry I weep at the drop of a hat. Have you a hankie? Statistically speaking my earning power should be 15 to 50 per cent higher than yours I just knew you were looking for a raise, you big galoot Now kindly get the hell out of my office, can’t you see I’m busy We each have our little imperfections But we manage to muddle through We populated the earth and then we die Things may change slowly But, believe me, change they do
22.
Satisfied 01:40
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So many children cut down in their prime So many in prison, no one knows the crime The people can’t get a doctor, can’t cure their disease Cuz you’re giving all their money to the oil companies You bugged my house. You tapped my phone Treat people like dogs, got ‘em begging for a bone Fuck me, fuck me, fuck me til you’re satisfied Anybody tries to lay the truth down Your machine makes ‘em out a fool and a clown You’re taxing all the poor to fill the rich one’s purse It’s just a fairy tale, Robin Hood in reverse You want me to be true to you When all you’re asking my government to do is just Fuck me, fuck me, fuck me til you’re satisfied You don’t listen to the people’s cries Safe and warm in your blanket of lies You could change. Get a handle on it But you really don’t give a shit
23.
Buggin' with Bugs 01:02
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It’s me and Bugs Bunny waiting for a call Got to find me something that will get me to nightfall I wannabe a TV gangsta like Bugs was in his prime He’d said “What sup?” for years back in 1949 I ain’t no Doc. I’m just trying to treat my habit My connection is some whacked out wascally wabbit I’m trying to find a place where I know just who I am Like when Bugs was living large and Elmer Fudd was the man I’m buggin’ with Bugs Me and media thugs pimpin’ corporate drugs I’m buggin’ with Bugs I just wanna find myself but I’m buggin’ Buggin’ with Bugs
24.
Drown My Throat 00:31
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I feel so bad when I read the letter that you wrote I believe I will go downtown and try to drown my throat
25.
Number Ten 01:25
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“Seventeen. Two hundred and fifty-nine.” When I was in the army stationed in Southeast Asia this is what I'd hear on a program that came on for a few minutes every morning on Air Force radio. I asked my friend "what is that?" He said, "it's better if I just show you.” So we got a taxi and rode out of town to a newly constructed asphalt road that led straight into the heart of the jungle. We came to a 10 foot tall hurricane fence and a big gate. The guard waved us past. Behind the gate was the main drag of what looked like an Old West cowboy town movie set with saloons along each side of the street. He said, choose one. So we walked into one. Inside there was a rock band playing full tilt and a lot of women sitting around dressed in short skirts and low-cut blouses. One walked up to me and said, “you want to dance G.I.?” On her blouse was a plastic button with a number. My friend said, “ask her about the number.” I said, “what's that number for?” She said, “You hear my number on radio. I number one. I number one.” I said, “no. No. What are the numbers on the radio?” She said, “number 10, number 10 no good, medic check for VD every week. I number one.” My friend said, "Just another perk. Your tax dollars at work."
26.
Caught Between the Itch and the Pain 01:35
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You look like someone I used to know I said to myself while shaving Where did all of the certainty go Is it still back there with the roaring and the raving Amazing the places you find yourself in When you're thinking that you've really got 'em Amazing what passes for love and for friends If your standards are close enough to the bottom Time to come out of the rain Caught between the itch and the pain I woke up naked in an uptown park Never even learned her name We must have met somewhere out in the dark I felt so bad I knew she felt the same I know she was thinking of me for a week It hurts even to describe it Cuz the place we chose fulfillment to seek Was a bed of poison ivy Time to come out of the rain Caught between the itch and the pain So many days lived in vain Caught between the itch and the pain When I think of myself in my full raging youth In my breath I feel the same old catching Once I know everything. I had a corner on the truth Now I just feel like scratching
27.
Your Butt Is Like a Symphony 01:21
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Your butt is like a symphony In times like these It calls out to me And I thank God That it speaks English But sometimes I believe When we’re in disagreement Your symphonic butt and me That its vocabulary is just too demanding And that I’m ruled by my dictionary
28.
Stick People in Love 01:07
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That nose is too big get the saw That breast is too small get the glue Somebody fire up the pencil sharpener. Nobody’s got a point of view Inflated lips, inflated dreams, hanging on a clothing rack Pumped up pecs, washboard abs, statuette, ready, set, cardiac It’s just the anorexic nightmare side of silicone gel It’s just the cyclic politic Pinocchio in hell It’s just the sound of stick people in love
29.
The Art of Communication School 00:50
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I know what I will pretend I’m talking to you And you can pretend you’re listening And that you actually give a crap About a single thing I say And we’ll call it the art of communication We’ll start our own communication school Just me and you
30.
I Got in Bed with Walmart 00:32
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I got in bed with Walmart And she’s not what she seems to be I was collecting trash for seven cents a day in cash She’s got me up to 23 Now I can feed almost 35 percent Of my whole family That’s why I got in bed with Walmart
31.
Somewhere There's a Road 01:30
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Somewhere there’s a road leading to the sea It sweeps down off the hill so majestically And I will find that road. It is my destiny And I will travel down though it might mean the death of me For on that road is a place I can’t forget A small convenience store where I can buy A beer A Lotto scratcher And a pack of cigarettes
32.
I'm Starting to Repeat Myself for Dummies 01:03
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I'm starting to repeat myself.
33.
The World Is Filled with Love 3 00:58
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I have to admit I have thought He got killed because he was stupid But lately I have come to believe They killed him because They were temporarily crazy The world is filled with love Beautiful people doing beautiful things Like they was sent from up above Life is a beautiful song for the one who sings
34.
The Universal Heart and Mind 01:26
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We are many people. We speak with the voice of one We face the same dilemma. We meet it all or none Like birds in their flock, like fish in their school We’re moving to the rhythm of the unifying pool Our thoughts are interchangeable. Our actions follow suit Like the ancient creosote we’re connected at the root At the very core of us the universal soul We are imperfect parts that make the perfect whole If evil attacks one of us the rest will all be there When the anteater on the ant hill eats us ants he’s brushing Ant Hillary’s hair There is strength in numbers. Those alone don’t grow We don’t know why we are this way and we don’t want to know So won’t you come and join us. Come on in the water’s fine Come and reap the benefits of the universal heart and mind

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released October 13, 2011

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Richard Haxton Los Angeles, California

From the middle of Mississippi, served in Viet Nam in Thailand, lives 5,000 feet from the world's oldest freeway. Searches for transcendence - or something - where science meets the spirit. Never quit fighting the war for the groove!

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